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Ijaz Butt Bans Himself
Posted on June 7, 2010 | 2 CommentsLahore, Pakistan: Ijaz Butt, PCB’s chairman, has successfully challenged and reversed a self-imposed ban on himself and a Rs. 23.432 million fine that was slapped on him by his self-appointed inquiry committee. In light of all the ridiculous appointments and indecisions in the last few... -
Desperate Stalker Surprised by Unexpected Success
Posted on May 28, 2010 | 20 CommentsSeen here is Saadia, about to read the most romantic message of her life. Multan, Pakistan: Desperate stalkers all over Pakistan were thrilled with delight last night after learning that one of their very own, Adnan Zaidi, successfully found romance online with a complete stranger.... -
Epic Phadda Ends in Major Disappointment
Posted on May 8, 2010 | 22 CommentsLahore, Pakistan: Last night, Minigolf on Main Boulevard was the scene of a planned showdown between two self-proclaimed ‘dons’ of Lahore, but expectedly ended without a single punch being thrown. The crowd of over 60 pubescent boys unfortunately had to all go home in disappointment. The... -
Shoaib Malik and Sania Mirza Solve Kashmir Issue, Proceed to Make Cute Babies
Posted on April 11, 2010 | 10 CommentsIslamabad, Pakistan: As expected, the new South Asian power couple of Shoaib Malik and Sania Mirza have solved the Kashmir conflict, bringing peace to Pakistan and India. According to reports, the governments of both countries, in accordance with the wishes of the Kashmiri people, will... -
Students Disappointed to Learn That St. Patrick’s Day is Not in Celebration of Pakistan
Posted on March 23, 2010 | 12 CommentsAnn Arbor, MI: Newspapers across the United States reported yesterday that Pakistani students accidentally confused St. Patrick’s Day as an event celebrating Pakistani culture. The confusion resulted in widespread embarrassment for several Pakistanis, who initially believed that for the first time, American students were celebrating... -
Ansar Abbasi: Musharraf Planning a 2nd Coup d’etat Through his Facebook Fan Page
Posted on March 1, 2010 | 22 CommentsKarachi, Pakistan: Senior Jang and The News special amazing Pulitzer prize winning zabardast correspondent, Ansar Abbasi, has accused Retired General Pervez Musharraf of planning a 2nd coup through his Facebook fan page. As a guest appearing in the television show ‘Meray Mutabiq,’ Mr. Abbasi accused... -
Javed Miandad Reminds Everyone That He is the Greatest
Posted on February 17, 2010 | 2 CommentsJaved Miandad was kind enough to write an exclusive opinion piece on the state of Pakistani cricket for Maila Times. Here is his article, reproduced below: To the glorious nation of Pakistani cricket fans, Let’s just get it out in the open – I am the only...
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